.I have patience more than you could ever understand(".

Thursday, February 08, 2007

When you love, you give that person the right not only to love you but also to hurt you. When you gave your heart, you did not just gave that person a dozen of roses but rather a dozen of knives to stab you. Because pain and pleasure come hand in hand in fulfilling the love you have to offer. Hurting each other is a proof to the existence of love between the two of you.

How I wish to hurt and then smile after realizing that he loves me so much he can't help but hurt me. How I wish to have that pain of being in love but get over it after I remember the day he told me he love or loved me. I'll wholeheartedly accept the heartache if he welcomes my love and get it reciprocated. I'd be more than willing to lay my heart in the line if i see it in his own hands. I am more than willing to ache if after that burden, I'd be back, lost in his eyes again with him lost in mine.

In english, I wanna love and be loved in return. Even with it is pain and heartache.
Oh come on. Be a sweetheart and give me the chance to be stabbed with the knife of love.

Can it get any more baduy than that?

4:35 AM

My classmates are the best, they encouraged me to just be honest and not forge the signature even if its a matter of life and death.

I actually have right now a carbon copy of that lecheng approval sheet (or should i call it an approval shit?) with the forged signature of my professor, and it does look good, not a simple hint that may drop me in the pit of hell. Sige kung ikaw ba, may isang yellow paper na naglalaman ng 10 posibleng title ng research mo, pinirmahan nya ang isa dahil approved na, and week after week, may paper kang ginagawa na habang tumatagal ay pahirap ng pahirap, hindi ka na natutulog para lang maka pass ng requirements, at dahil sobrang hassle mo na, nakaligtaan mo na kailangan palang itago ung approval sheet, at pagdating ng panahon na i fifinalize mo na yung paper mo at sobrang pinaghirapan mo, gandang ganda ka na sa ginawa mo tapos nung ipapass mo na, narealize mo na nawawala na pala yung approval sheet? At hindi tatanggapin ang final paper mo kung wala yun???? Sige nga hindi ka ba ma tetempt na gumawa ng panibago at i forge nalang ang signature nya? Ganun kadali at tatanggapin na ang pinaghirapan mong paper??

Pero hindi ata kinaya ng konsensya ko, salamat sa mga sobrang honest kong classmates, at narealize kong mali nga siguro yun. Kaya ipagdasal nyong tanggapin ang paper ko bukas kahit wla ung approval sheet? Because what matters most is the final paper and the fact that I passed all needed papers on time.

How journalistic of us? Standing up for what is true and what is right.

4:22 AM

Monday, February 05, 2007

That's right. I'm a journalist and I stand for the truth. Well, I'm a future Journalist but I do stand for the truth. Right this very moment, I can't get the shirt off of me, in fact I wanna roam around just to show that I am a part of the UST Journalism Society. Looking forward to graduating on 2010 and really get to work. I wanna be a Sports Journalist. The one they listen to. Kinda like be in the level of Norman Black, Quinito Henson or even Boom Gonzales. A Basketball Journalist more like it. Because frankly, Basketball is getting kind of untrue, ethics wise. And I'll be that Journalist, bringing back the truth, setting up new values.
And to think I almost took up Communication Arts. Career mode ang pagiging Peryodista!!!
Pinagdadasal ko sa kasalukuyan na sana gabayan ako ng Panginoon sa apat na taon pang ilalagi ko sa Pamantasan ng Santo Tomas. Sana makapagaral akong mabuti para makatapos. Tapos magiging intern na ko, tapos magiging sports writers sa mga minor sports shows hanggang maging host na hanggang i hire na ko ng pba para maging isa sa analyst nila...Saya!!! Lahat ng ito ay hinihiling ko sa ating panginoong Hesu Kristo. Amen.

Be with me at the progress of my dream.(",)

3:52 AM

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Ginebra is on to the finals!!! And what's great about it is that I saw them in flesh while they fought hard to earn that finals slot!!! Don't worry I'm not gonna brag about Mark Caguioa's stats or anything like that, Ronald Tubid was the one who carried them through.. And Mac Mac Cardona, the next time you want a hard foul, don't make it so obvious, it's lonely driving home alone while your team fight for survival ha?

Anyway, I decided to cheer for Red Bull next since my Ateneo players are all there, and I have to support cha..and u know what? God loves me, I prayed Ginebra would win and they did, I prayed Red Bull would win, and they did too. Funny how the girls in our back continue to pick on the Red Bull players and all we can do is cheer for Rico and the rest, and when the momentum shifted on their side, all they could say was "hahaha, dadada, dudududu" - the exact same words... What do you have to say now huh? Actually, may pagmamayabang kaming ginawa ni Cha e..habang nilalait nila ang mga players ng red bull at pinariringgan kami, at napuno na kami at gusto na naming patulan, nag english nalang kami out of frustration saying "the last time I heard PBA was Philiipine BASKETBALL association, its not about face value its about the game values" and something like "god, this is a league made with rules, you are the ones who should know the game ethics" at natahimik sila rin sila sa wakas, englishan lang pala katapat nyo a....hindi na namin kasalanan un... And we met Paolo Bugia's dad!!!! With the help of Sir Acuna, we approached him and asked where paolo was, and he said he had sprain, ahahaha, daddy nagkita na tayo!!! And I also had the chance to smile (Sir Acuna did all the talking) to Enrico Villanueva!!!

I hope that it'll be Red Bull vs. Ginebra in the finals. All San Miguel knows is to live behind Ginebra's shadow. Don't hide under Jong Uichico and Siot Tanquincen's skirts, coz they aint have one... Grow up!!!

It's one of the best nights ever... I used to watch them in the t.v and used to jump for happiness whenever I captured a good shot on the t.v with my phone. And now I'm able to see them upclose and talk to them! I'm living a dream.

Hey thanks to Basketball. It provides a diversion of attention whenever I feel lost in reality. I'm forever gonna be a fan. Not a groupie. I have a life. I'm a fan, and I love being one.

Thanks my Gin Kings, you never fail to put a smile on my face.(",)

7:25 AM

Saturday, February 03, 2007

"Not knowing is the greatest mystery you could ever have about someone else, and how much you can love is the greatest discovery you could ever make about yourself"

And I failed both.

Sabi nila wala daw taong sadyang magkaparehas, wala din daw taong papasa sa mga hanap mo. Wlang dreamboy na nageexist. Somebody is bound to be different than what he seems to be to you. Yun daw pagkakaiba nyo ang magpapasaya ng samahan kasi dadaan ang mga araw na may nalalaman kayong bago sa isat isa. A never ending learning process kumbaga. Siguro nga. I'm a perfectionist and I admit it. I ask for love but rejects every possibility of one because of little imperfections i find. I look for love but refuse to recognize it if one comes to me because i'm too preoccupied with what I found. Sa paghahanap ko ng Mr. Right at sa atensyong binibigay ko sa taong akala ko siya na, lumilipas ang mga pagkakataong siguro un na. Because I find one that suits my description of a perfect soulmate and limits my world to him and only him.
May nagsabi sakin takot daw akong mag risk. Takot daw akong magmahal. I don't think so, its more of being afraid to find out how much I can love. Siguro torpe ang tawag dun? Ano ba ang tawag sa torpeng babae? Yung tipong halos sinasabi na sayo ng lalake na special sya sayo pero sinisira mo ang momentum sa isang corny na joke dahil takot kang malaman ang pwdeng mangyari kung sinakyan mo ang pagtatapat nya. Dahil takot kang malaman ang pwedeng mangyari kung magtatapat ka. Na dahil siguro sa may nahanap ka ng mahal mo o pwede mong mahalin ay iniisip mong magkakatutuo ang pangarap mo at hindi mo na kailangan ng iba pa kundi siya lang. Na hindi mo alam na hindi lahat ng gustuhin mo ay mapuupunta sayo. Na may ibang dapat pinagbabalingan mo ng atensyon. That you should be willing to put your heart on the line even with someone who doesn't seem to be the boy of your dreams.

I'm a sucker for destiny. And I guess that's bad?
Could it be that it'll be you?

9:29 AM

ERRATUM
Richard Gomez is not running under administration but rather has announced to pass his senatorial candidacy under the opposition.

Sorry bout that, my bad, my bad. BUT, that does not nullify the validity of my statement when I said that Richard Gomez is unreasonable, bias, egoistic, and a LOSER!!!

Don't vote for him. If you do, you are making the same mistake you committed when you voted for Fernando Poe Jr. in the last election....Glad there was some comelec negotiations that time, though illegal, Fpj would've been a societal suicide for the Philippines. I know you won't listen to a 16 year old, lover desperate, follower of a local superhero, an insecure failing freshman student like me, but then, I'll try.

HUWAG NYO SIYANG IBOBOTO PWEDE???

5:22 AM

It's easy to deny it.
It's easy to set it aside.
It's easy to forget about it.
But not so when everything around you seems to be saying "you're a loser" out loud.

I am filled with insecurity from head to toe, covered with negativity all over.
Kinda hard dealing with it right? I know. Been doing it for 16 years.
Feeling the same? Too bad. I don't know what to do with it either.

12:27 AM

Would you believe it?? Ginebra was down by 3 with only 30 seconds or less on the game clock and ironically, Ginebra won by 3 points 108-105!! They now earned a twice-to-beat advantage come Game 6 on Sunday, which I'm gonna watch live despite being loaded with so much school work to do over the weekend.

That's the reason why I'm here staying in with my computer on my lap with no company other than Brian McKnight's music while my friends and maybe a lot of AB students are enjoying 'Haute Wheels' and fashion show. I prefer to not go since I won't have time doing it tomorrow coz I'm gonna be excited to watch Game 6 live in Araneta!

Glad I didn't go though, coz my legs hurt like hell after yesterday's softball game in P.E which didn't go well to say the least, its called beginner's jitters my friend...

Well, seeing that I have a limited connection, I should publish this now and get my butt to work and finish that darn paper and English. Wish me luck.(",)

12:11 AM

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Hve you heard the news?? Richard Gomez is gonna run for Senator!! God forbid, we might have aanother celebrity senator again. Not that I'm stereotyping celebrity politicians and all, but Richard Gomez???? oK. He might be Hot and all that....no I don't think he's hot, It's just that we studied Rolando Tolentino's work in Phil. Literature and he regarded Richard Gomez as the Philippine symbol of manhood. Watch S-Files sometimes and you'll see how he can so unreasonable at defending his side. He is so subjective, ok so he does have a few good arguments, that is if he's not involved in the issue, but if he is, like that issue of not being able to pay the tax and all and the Erik Santos-Richard Gomez controversy, My GOD! How unreasonable can he get??? I swear, I wanted to throw the glass I'm holding against the tv! He likes to take side and with his riches, fame and all that, what is gonna happen to the Philippine Government????

I wish I'm 18 so I could vote now. Come on! Richard Gomez has been in the industry for like forever, so he knows how to put up an act!! Remember that he was then a vocal critique of Gloria Arroyo, even went to the extent of calling her a fake President and now he's running under the Administration????????? Talk about a man covered up with lies!!! Just because people are starting to have lesser attention for you, you're gonna enter the Politics world to redeem your name??? Putangina ang loser!!!!

Nananawagan ako sa mga mamamayang Pilipino, pumili naman kayo ng tamang iboboto!!!
Utang na loob!! Nakakasawa na ang mga welga!! Magsiayos kayo!!

5:42 AM

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Coach Jong Uichico and the rest of the Ginebra Gin Kings won against Talk n' text in their 4th game, 110-103, and tied the series at 2 games a piece. Mark Caguioa was hailed Best player of the game with 37 pts and 4 assts to improve his chances at the 2007 MVP race.

Naks parang Sports lead lang a!!! For a moment, Talk n' text fans actually thought that they'd get the better off of Ginebra! Not in a million years!! General admissions ticket: Php 5, Jeepney ride to Cubao: Php 12, The face on the Pumaren siblings as Ginebra hit shots after shots: priceless!!! Derek Pumaren, you're just like your brothers Fran and Dindo, making it quite high but failing to reach the top!! Asa pa!! And all that without their key center Erik Menk! I still remember back when Rudy Hatfield said in their opening game : "We came here to win nothing less than the championship. For those who are aspiring for it, you can stop, because it's about over!" That stament is slowly becoming to be a valid fact as the series continues. And speaking of confident statements like that, Mark Caguioa, the player who mostly say such statements, said in that game 4: "If I wasn't able to score last time, its not because they have great defense, its because I really can't score. Nobody can stop me, ako lang ang pwedeng pumigil sa sarili ko", and with that said, the game was won with him having 37 points - 4 assists - 9/10 freethrow percentage as his game statistics. Whoever said Michael Jordan is the best there is and the best there ever will be probably wasn't aware that there is a freshman Mark Caguioa playing for Eagle Rock High. And will eventually become a part of the greatest PBA team ever and will continue the legacy that the legend Robert Jaworski himself started. If Ginebra makes it to the finals and Mark Caguioa still wouldn't win the MVP award, there is something fishy going on with the PBA Board of Committee. He is the top scorer in the league, the key player of the Champion team (yeah, we'll be champions), a consistent player throughout the conference, and has a fair percentage in the assist and rebound department, he is indeed the most deserving of the title!

On Monday, there is a paper in English to be passed, a quiz in Economics and reporting in CWG. What the hell? I'm gonna watch Game 6 live on Sunday. You know what my fearless forecast is? Ginebra will win on friday that will make them 1 game short to the finals and I'm gonna be watching the Fast the Furious and the fearless, the H bomb, the flying A in flesh while they take Ginebra to the finals!! After months of waiting, I'm finally gonna be able to shout GINEBRA! GINEBRA! along with my fellow ka-barangays while we watch fouled outs Asi Taulava and Yancy de Ocampo squirm in the bench as Mac Cardona scratches his head because of a Mark Caguioa three point shot made against him. Now that's a pretty sight to watch! Hey Rommel Aduccul, don't you miss the crowd support and the thrills of making a free throw with a Ginebra #10 jersey on your back?? Too bad... I bet Jimmy Alapag's ass that Derek Pumaren will never win against the magic of Jong Uichico and Siot Tanquincen!!

6:35 AM

I had a good tuesday last time. Our Literature professor from last sem had a talk called Ustingan and she chose our class to attend the talk. That means we won't have Theology (aww too bad, I miss my beloved adviser already) but the good thing is we won't have Sociology either (haha!! It couldn't get any better!) Our class and 1jrn I think were the only first years who listened to the talk and I learned that the people who attended was chosen by Mrs. Lising. Before it starts, she went up the stage and said to the microphone these exact words :"I'm glad that those who are present here are the people I've been wanting to see lately, (she then introduced her senior and junior classes), and most especially, 1jrn and 1jrn2, one of the smartest freshmen I have ever handled". See???? We are one of the best class ever!!!! And that came from none other than Dr. Irene Lising, one of the few professors in the Faculty of arts and letters with a Phd degree! Now that's what I'm talking about. Anyway, that started out well, and what followed was better. The talk was about Children's literature. And I now have another name to include in my idols list : Tito Doc(sorry, I couldn't quite remember what his full name was). He's the best! If I have extra money, I'd buy a couple of his books :Duglit and Ang pambihirang buhok ni Racquel, If I enjoy it, I might as well read his entire collection!! And oh, before forget, the other speaker, Mrs. Chong, is another children's book author who have won Palanca award for the last two years said that those people who grew up in the province is usually more kinder than those who grew up in the city!! uhhuurrm, uhhuurrm!! Go TARLAC!! If I know, what she really wants to say but didn't because she didn't want to offend anybody is that, those form the province are more of a better person than those from the city......hahaha!!
And to end that night was Ms. Ferdie Lopez in yet another stunning attire for a yet another wonderful class discussion!! Literature professors are one of the best there is!! Dr. Lising and Ms. Ferdie Lopez are the best from the bunch!!
Oh and that tuesday, I want to say thank YOU again.(",)

4:03 AM

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

I miss my Bespren. And right now, I'm trying to stop myself from getting my phone and text him. I miss seating beside you everyday and never minding if I'm gonna be scolded by every teacher because of talking to you. I miss meeting up with you to make a project and celebrate together when we get a high grade. I miss going up to you and ask you to make my assignments and you say no and the feeling I get when the next day you show up with your assignment and mine all the same. I miss helping you with some school works and how you say thank you to me after that. I regret that I spent the last months of our senior year ignoring you. That could've been another 4 months of spending with you. I care about you bespren so much and I always will, I pray that you find the girl you were always looking for as I search for mine.

6:32 AM

Instead of sulking over a love story which is yet to come true and so close to failing because of a million reasons that I don't know which one should I worry about anymore, I'd rather watch my super crush Makisig Morales play Super Inggo, one day, I'd be his babes. It isn't child abuse you know, humanap ka din ng crush mong bata! I'm a super baduy follower of local star search and I support my idols to death, so you can just imagine my feeling when Makisig didn't won in Little Big star. Anyway, isn't he so adorable? Imagine, he's a kid, entered in a singing contest, and starred in a fantaserye in a major network immediately after losing the contest, and there isn't a sign of beginner's jitter??? Have you seen and heard him sing Ikaw? I almost fell to my feet.
When he grows up and turn 16, I'm gonna barge in straight to ABS-CBN studio into his dressing room and ask him to be my boyfriend. By then, I'll be super in love with him and I'd be the third girl, besides from Lois Lane and Mary Jane Watson, to have a super hero boyfriend.
And when he turns 21 which is his legal age and I guess I'd be settled journalist by then, I'm gonna ask him to marry me and we'll be the Headmasters of Power Academy. Ever wondered why Super Inggo doesn't have a super hero loveteam (Maya isn't a superhero)?? Its because me and Makisig heven't reached our time yet. Until then, Super Inggo will be saving lives and fly his way to me.

Crazy huh? Find someone to fantacize about and wipe that stupid smile off of your face as you read this. (",)

6:12 AM

Since someone desperately wants to be a part of my 'favorite couple list', im gonna do her a big favor and put them in even though my list's number 1 requirement is that they should be a real couple. Im a good friend that's why.

Ok. Here it is.

Angelique and Mr. Political tumbler - They are constantly texting and chatting, which are the first steps towards a real love story. Angie developed a big crush on him and even sends message to us whenever Mr. Political tumbler tell her something sweet like:
Angie: What do you want?
Mr. Political tumbler: YOU
I thought it wasn't that big of a deal until that time when I was with Angie and I was the first one to say hi to Mr. Political tumbler and he ignored me and tried to talk to ange. Bad thing for me, super good thing for her.

Me and YOU.
Reality doesn't agree. But my hearts says so.

5:00 AM